My King, He is everything to me

love

There is something about Third Day that makes me feel like I am home.

Click here to be blessed.

No matter what you are going through, things change, seasons change, people change…

But, He is ONE constant…

Who is this King of Glory that persues me with his love
And haunts me with each hearing of His softly spoken words
My conscience, a reminder of forgiveness that I need
Who is this King of Glory who offers it to me
Who is this King of angels, O blessed Prince of Peace
Revealing things of Heaven and all its mysteries
My spirit?s ever longing for His grace in which to stand
Who’s this King of glory, Son of God and son of man
His name is Jesus, precious Jesus
The Lord Almighty, the King of my heart
The King of glory
Who is this King of Glory with strength and majesty
And wisdom beyond measure, the graceous King of kings
the Lord of Earth and Heaven, the Creator of all things
Who is this King of Glory, He’s everything to me
The Lord of Earth and Heaven, the Creator of all things
He is the King of glory, He’s everything to me
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“Well,” she scratched her head. “what we have here is a soul tie.”

bondage

A soulish relationship will strengthen the soul of man rather than the spirit. It will depend on the soul (the mind, will, and emotions) rather than rely on the spirit. A soulish relationship will feed the unrenewed mind, and it will fixate on emotional gratification rather than spiritual edification. A spiritual relationship, on the other hand, is one that is built on sound biblical principles, one that honors God above all else, and one that prefers character building to emotional fulfillment. A spiritual relationship is one where each will put the other first, and where Christ-like principles will be observed in all things.

Oh, those stinkin’ soul ties, huh?

Everything starts out fine. Or at least it did with me. At first, when we talked I was feeling drawn to get into the Word more. It was wonderful! The more he spoke the Word, the more I loved him. It was like iron sharpening iron.

Surely, this is the man for me!

But then things in our relationship began to change. Quickly, I might add. We weren’t praying together as much. I do believe that was when I began to realize we weren’t going to make it. But, I held on. Why? Soul ties. Our souls were knitted together.

I don’t think these ties happen by accident, we make a choice.

The tumultuous relationship took it’s toll on me. When we were together I felt drained, tired, pensive, insecure…

But on our “off” times I felt more creative, spent more time with God.

soul-ties

Still I missed him during our off times. Sometimes so much so it was painful. Sure enough we would start talking again and get back together and the patterns would repeat itself. Slowly this relationship was killing my spirit. And I can’t imagine it was healthy for him either.

It is not enough to know when a relationship has gone south and you need to end it. We must take action. We must listen to wisdom. Because when we allow our emotions to give way, it can turn to anger. Then the anger gives way to other emotions, up, down, back, and forth. Then jealousy creeps in and we cling, we cry, we throw our fit. This is not love.

As my mind was wandering, and my emotions were beginning to mirror my thoughts, I heard Holy Spirit remind me, “take captive my thoughts.”

What does this mean to take captive my thoughts?

It means to reject the thoughts that serve only to upset me, hinder me, depress me, and tear me down. But we can’t just sit there with empty minds. That’s not possible. We must choose what to think on.

I like what Philippians 4:8 say’s: Finally, believers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable and worthy of respect, whatever is right and confirmed by God’s word, whatever is pure and wholesome, whatever is lovely and brings peace, whatever is admirable and of good repute; if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think continually on these things [center your mind on them, and implant them in your heart].

When I operate from the soul, it gets me in trouble. It makes me want to lash out and defend myself. It causes

mad ladyme to hold onto something or someone so hard I choke the life out of it. It makes me say things I wish I never said, or do things I wish I never did. The end result is I end up feeling worse and now I have given the enemy more ammunition.

When I walk in the Spirit and meditate on His principles, His promises, I feel lighter, at peace, and hopeful.

There is a battle between the spirit and the flesh. The flesh wants what it wants and it wants it now. An unhealthy relationship, an unGodly soul tie, will destroy you. There is a reason someone gets under our skin. There is a reason we keep having thoughts and we feel the sense of urgency to “react”. And the reason is not God.

It is hard t let go of someone when you love them. When it comes to matters of the heart, the emotion, there is no reasoning. This is why we must be Spirit minded.

This is why we must choose wisely who we allow into our lives; who we give room to.

snake

There are forces at work that we do not see. When we get so wrapped up in emotions we are blinded. This is a trick and how we can be convinced a snake is really our friend and just wants to be cuddled.

I was feeling hard on myself the other morning. I felt so stupid to have walked back into what God clearly wanted me to give up. Let’s call it what it is…disobedience. And the Holy Spirit so graciously brought this verse to my remembrance…

When the disciples heard this, they were completely astonished and bewildered, saying, “Then who can be saved [from the wrath of God]?” But Jesus looked at them and said, “With people [as far as it depends on them] it is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” Matthew 19:25-26

Let’s not beat ourselves up anymore. OK?

Yea, break -ups hurt. Learn with me, when God says no, then let it be no and trust Him.

You can bag manure in as pretty a bag as you want, but in the end, it is still _ _ _ _.      You get what I am saying? It stinks!

So, if you feel the tie with someone and you struggle to let go, and you are so fixated you can hardly think of anything else to the point it is interfering with your daily life and sleep, you just might have a soul tie. Time to break it and move on.

You have to choose freedom. Recognize the images you repeat in your mind are bondage. Don’t be afraid to let it go.

And yes, I am speaking this to myself as well

Repent, forgive, let go. (Repeat if necessary)

 

 

Nothing deep… just human

touch

Have you ever just wanted to write something so profound, so very deep, it would be like a light bulb to the minds and hearts of the reader,  and it would bring instant healing and understanding? But, instead you stare at the pc and your mind goes blank? Because truth is, the deepness you are feeling right now is like the edge of the abyss?

Yea? Me too.

In fact, I am in somewhat of  pensive mood this evening. Maybe it’s because I am tired? Maybe it’s because I kind of have a lot on my plate right now? Maybe it’s because I just want a hug and a nap?

I am feeling like the woman who weaved her way through the crowd just to touch Jesus. I am sure she was tired, too. I bet when she heard He was in town she gathered herself up and said “This is it! If I am ever going to be healed now is the time.”

Or the woman who wept at His feet? Oh,  the peace and security to just feel the coolness of the floor and the warmth of His presence. He wouldn’t even have to verbally speak. There would not be enough words in all the languages combined to  express His touch.

I am a little tired and I am feeling the weight of “aloneness.” I know that doesn’t sound very “spiritual” or much like faith, but I am human, you know.  I just want to lay myself at His feet and just rest.

How to NOT Catch Him and Keep Him. Or… how to feed your already low self image and keep feeling bad about yourself

recovery

(I seriously do not recommend following the advice in the following list unless you truly enjoy the abuse.)

  1. Keep chasing after him. Convince yourself he will soon realize how much you love him.
  2. Don’t take no for an answer. If he doesn’t answer your calls, no problem! He must be busy, just try again later, and again, and again, and again…
  3. When he tells you he loves you and then ignores you for days, believe him. After all, his words are enough, he doesn’t need to back anything up with actions.
  4. Constantly compare yourself to his ex. Sure he is over her. He only tells you about her because he would love you so much more if you could be like her.
  5. Agree with everything he says! No matter what.
  6. If he is “concerned” about any of your friends, immediately unfriend them. He is not jealous, he just knows best.
  7. Cry. Cry A LOT! Then when he shows back up and tells you it was all your fault, chalk it up as a silly misunderstanding and welcome him back.
  8. Excuse his bad behavior and unkindness. He was having a bad day, he is just misunderstood. Soon he will realize you are the one there for him all the time.
  9. When he tells you you are the best thing he has ever had, believe him. Because he would have never said this to anyone else.
  10. If he leads you on for over two years and breaks up with you at a whim, with no reasoning, no communication, and even if he is talking to other women, do not go on with your life. Talk to no one! After all, when he comes back and tells you about the conversations with the other women, he will reassure you they were not like you. You mustn’t hurt or upset him by not waiting patiently for him.
  11. No matter how many lies he says about you, you must forgive him. He was just hurt.
  12. Back handed compliments are better than no compliments at all. When he tells you how nice you look, and then asks if you gained some weight, immediately stop eating!
  13. Answer every late night call or text. It might be an emergency. It has to be an emergency, or he would have called you earlier at a reasonable time of day.
  14. When he talks over you, cuts you off, turns the conversation back to him… remember, at least he is talking to you.
  15. Drop everything for him, make time for him no matter what, whenever he needs it. Because his time is more valuable than yours and you should understand that.
  16. Never block him from facebook, or other social media, because when he has unblocked you, how else will he know you are still waiting for him?
  17. Believe no one but him! They are all lying about him.
  18. Convince yourself you are happy.
  19. Refuse to see any similarities between him and your absentee father. You gotta fill that void. You need the approval of a strong man and remember… only a strong man can lift you up after he tears you down.
  20. Believe him when he says you are not in Gods will for his life. It’s true. This is really true, because Gods will for you is not to be in his life.

I hope you know, the list above is not to be taken serious. But this is exactly what we do when we are in a bad, unhealthy, toxic relationship. We allow someone to treat us so bad, because inside we do not know our value. If you do not know your own worth, you will tolerate, rationalize, justify, excuse, over look, and apologize for anything.

traits

How will you ever love and receive love if you are steeped in this dysfunction of a relationship? Tell him to step aside, because he is blocking your view.

Get your heart and head right. Take some time alone. Get the healing. Get in the Word and alone with God and listen to what He has to say about you. Because He is the only true lover of your soul. Then when the time is right, when your healing is complete, He will bring someone across your path and you will recognize him.

You can’t love or receive love, when you don’t know what/who love is.

 

Homeless in Seattle

homeless

I live in a city where there are a lot of homeless people. LOTS of homeless people.

I am a city girl, I have mostly always lived in cities. I grew up in NYC, so that should give you some idea of what I mean by cities. I have traveled to most major cities across the U.S. and I have seen some good places and some “shady” places.

I recently moved to Seattle, WA and there are a lot of homeless people here. Lots of homeless people!

Not quite knowing the city yet, I used to catch the bus on Jackson Street. It was a close walk from my office. Now this bus stop had a lot of shady characters around it. Usually the bus stop was filled with people waiting for a bus, so I wasn’t alone and there was some false sense of security of being safe in a crowd of people. Until someone got gunned down in broad daylight right behind the bus stop (again). That was my clue to find a different bus stop.

(I pause for a moment here for a quick disclaimer: I am not suggesting all homeless people are violent.)

As a single mom, relocated to the other side of the country, for a job that is heavily bonus based, I am reminded many of us are just one paycheck away from being homeless. So, I do get that little taste of fear when the office is not producing what they should be and how it will reflect on my paychecks. Thankfully God has not failed me! He provides.

Yet, still I am sometimes still taken aback when I see such hopelessness on the streets.

I recall back in the 80’s when they released people onto the streets because the hospitals and prisons were over crowded. Many of these people needed to be in a hospital, with medication, and psychiatric help. Yet, these poor people were released onto the streets, a danger to themselves and to others.

This is what I see everyday here.

Pike and Pine Streets are busy streets. They are bustling with people. Tourists, homeless, hustlers, business people, drunks, street performers, street beggars, police on bikes, etc… You see the best of humanity here and the worse.

When you see this everyday it is hard to not become hardened to it; indifferent. Every block you are approached by someone asking for money, a smoke, or whatever, and you learn to point your face gaze straight ahead and act like they don’t even exist (I haven’t yet perfected this) as if they aren’t even human. Sad, isn’t it?

Yet, I can’t help but to wonder, what is their story? How did they end up here? Did they have families?

I befriended one of these homeless people. His name is Charlie. Charlie is a street prophet. He has been homeless for over a year and everyday he stands on the same corner ministering to people. He can always be found praying for people. He holds a sign saying “Hold on, Jesus is coming”

Every time Charlie sees me he smiles and says, “Hello my little friend,  are you well?”

I am learning quite a bit from Charlie. I compare him to a modern day Job. Before now, Charlie used to be a successful business man. He never wanted for money. He was in love. He was living the life. A little while before he lost everything, God tried to warn him, he sent a prophet to him and told him he was going to lose everything (you see, Charlie put his success before God. He got wrapped up in it, caught up in the “fame” and no longer acknowledged Who his blessings came from.) Soon after, the prophecy came true. He lost everything and everyone.

Now, for those of us who know Job’s story, we know Job was a righteous man. I am not suggesting Charlie was living a righteous life. But, I am believing Charlie will experience the same kind of restoration as Job did.  Everyday Charlie is out there witnessing for God. He is not bitter. And he is a giver.

Today I saw Charlie, and he asked me… “Friend, did you eat today?” I told him I haven’t because I was too busy to eat. I will eat when I get home. He reached into his bag and gave me a gift card for a local restaurant and told me to go get something to eat, he wanted to bless me because I am his friend.

My first thought was to not take the gift card. I mean, he is a homeless man, he should use it. I felt if I took it it would be robbing him. But, just as quick as I thought that, another thought told me to take it and say thank you. You see, Charlie was giving out of his own need. He wanted to be a blessing and he was truly showing great faith in God.

So, I accepted the gift card from him. I thanked him for it and his face lit up. He told me people will not accept gifts from him, even though he wants to give them, because they pity him. They feel because he is homeless he is somehow less of a man. He gave me a hug and thanked me, as if it were him who received a gift.

Now, remember what I said about how hard it is to not become hardened when you see homelessness all around you? Do you think it is because they are a reminder to our own humanity? Could it be we are afraid? Maybe not so much afraid of them, but afraid because it could happen to us? Could we possibly think if we ignore them they will go away? Are we who have homes, jobs, families, health, really better? Superior? More righteous?

I am reminded of a couple things. 

First, Jesus said in Matthew 25:35-45…

 For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in,  I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’

“Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink?  When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’

“The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’

“Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me,you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. 42 For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, 43 I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’

“They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’

“He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’

Second…

Hebrews 13:2 forewarns us… Do not neglect to extend hospitality to strangers [especially among the family of believers—being friendly, cordial, and gracious, sharing the comforts of your home and doing your part generously], for by this some have entertained angels without knowing it.

Am I saying Charlie is an angel? No, probably not. But, I am saying he is a man, a human, a brother in Christ, and if I were to just judge him by his appearance I would never know it.

How many more Charlies are there out there?

I hope you got something out of this post. I hope you remember Charlie the next time you see someone who looks unlovely, maybe doesn’t smell so good, or just looks like a “bum”. Be careful my friend, everyone has a story. The same God Who created you also created him.

If you love God you will love others. Because let us not forget, the smell of a homeless person smells like the sweetest of colognes when we compare to the stench of our own righteousness in Gods nostrils.

Pure and unblemished religion [as it is expressed in outward acts] in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit and look after the fatherless and the widows in their distress, and to keep oneself uncontaminated by the [secular] world. James 1:27

Be kind. Walk in love. Share His joy.

 

 

Walk Away

accept

It took me a while to learn this. What a tough lesson! I mean, have you ever been with that person who no matter how bad they treated you, you still find yourself apologizing to them? They could disappear for days, weeks, and when they come back they tell you it was all your fault and you… apologize?

OK, so here is the thing, no matter what their reasoning is, right or wrong, no one has a right to treat you badly. If they feel you have wronged them they have a choice to make, stay or leave. If they stay, forgive and work it out. If they leave, then let them go.

Back and forth, back and forth, is not good. Not if you want a real, mature, healthy, and growing relationship. Where is the security when you are not free to be yourself in a relationship? If you can not be yourself and you are constantly trying to please someone else to keep them, you will find you will not much like the you that you have become. And guess what? They will leave anyway.

Being with someone just for the sake of not being alone is no reason to be with someone. You are wasting your time and theirs. You are delaying the inevitable. Just let them go!

What is acceptable to you? Where are your boundaries? You better know the answer to this question, or you are in for a world of hurt.

Practice these words: “This behavior is not acceptable.”

Then my friend, when that unacceptable behavior continues, you do not have to stay. Walk away.

You can still love them, but love them from a distance. Because love, by its very definition, would never treat you poorly. I am not suggesting everything must be perfect and you must always agree on everything, but where there is no respect, trust, patience, kindness, humility,  and commitment, there is no love. You may have something, but it is not love.

(Disclosure: This post is not written for the married, I do not advocate divorce.)